“We would never have sex with you. It’s gross.” DNA suggests you did.

"Let me guess: You're the direct ancestor of humans, right?"

More like your sexier distant cousins, since we share a common ancestor. But humans didn't evolve from neanderthals.

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"Where are you REALLY from?"

Obviously, not America. It's complicated, but if you want specifics....

Our early ancestors most likely evolved into Neanderthals at least 230,000 years ago in Europe or Asia (but it could even be thousands of years earlier than that). So, I guess, that makes us Eurasian? I dunno?

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"But what kind of human are you?"

Denisovan, obviously. Lol, JK. Nobody has even heard of Denisovans. Those poor, unfortunate souls.

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"Wait a second... Are you even...human?"

Why are people constantly debating this? Homo sapiens or Homo neanderthalensis? We're both from the Homo genus so does it really matter?

Some scientists spread rumors that Neanderthals are a sub-species of modern humans, but the latest research suggests that we are a distinct species of our own. A 2015 study published in the Journal of Human Evolution even found anatomical differences between our species and humans in some of our smallest bones.

We're always living in modern human's shadow, sadly.

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