A Song of Nutters and Geezers.

HBO / Daniel Dalton / BuzzFeed

Last week, news broke that national treasure and lamb kebab enthusiast Danny Dyer had auditioned for a role in HBO's Game of Thrones.

He didn't get the part, so I decided to fix that for him, and for all of you.

BBC

Danny Dyer is Lord of Winterfell, a seat of power in the North of Westeros.

A deserter has been captured fleeing his post at the great wall, which keeps out the Scottish, and Danny has to deal with him.

HBO / Tim P. Whitby / Getty Images / Daniel Dalton / BuzzFeed

The way he deals with him is to chop his head off with a big fucking sword.

"Have some of that, you mug."

HBO

View Entire List ›