Sorry, Big fans. You’re not going to like this.

Hello! We (Tabatha, Ailbhe, and Roz) have seen every episode of Sex And The City approximately 1,000 times.

Recently, we got to thinking... what would happen if we tried to rank the show's men?

Ailbhe: So which of the women would you marry? I think probably Charlotte for me.

Roz: Yes, Charlotte. Except she can be a pain in the arse.

Tabatha: IDK, I reckon Miranda would make a good wife.

Ailbhe: URGH. MIRANDA? NEVER. YOU WOULD ALWAYS BE MINDING BRADY.

Tabatha: But she'd look after your mum if she became senile in her old age.

Roz: Aw, that is true.

HBO

Richard Wright

Ailbhe: Richard is like a bachelor uncle who goes to "gentlemen’s clubs" and has dinner there.

Tabatha: Richard gives me the creeps.

Ailbhe: For a while I didn’t mind him because Samantha knew what was up. But when he started messing her around, I was like: No. She is better than this.

Tabatha: Remember when he gets a private jet to Atlantic City with Samantha and Charlotte and he basically has sex with Samantha there and then. So rude.

Ailbhe: And Charlotte was feeling old as well! It was her birthday!

Roz: He did bring out one of the best moments in the show though. When Samantha sticks up flyers saying “This man is a cheater” and the police officer is all, “Excuse me, ma'am, you can’t do that." And she says, “This man ate another woman’s pussy out.” “Oh, go ahead ma'am.”

Ailbhe: And she throws a martini in his face. Very satisfying.

Roz: Such a badass moment.

HBO

Trey MacDougal

Ailbhe: URGGHHHHHHHHHH

Tabatha: God, he's awful. This actor plays the exact same character in Desperate Housewives too: Orson.

Roz: Ewwwww. The worst. And his MOTHER is just the worst, too. What was her name? Bunny?

Ailbhe: Bunny Mc Dougal was a terrible person.

Tabatha: Sorry but I disagree. Bunny MacDougal is the woman I aspire to be.

Roz: She was awwffffulllll!!

Tabatha: She was SO POWERFUL though.

Ailbhe: That’s only because she OWNED SO MUCH PROPERTY. She was literally powerful.

Tabatha: But she was also INCREDIBLY glam. Her hair was always so elegantly pinned back.

Roz: Back to Trey. I hated how Charlotte was so feeble around him.

Tabatha: OMG sorry to be gross, but remember when he couldn’t get an erection and she just found him wanking over the bathroom sink.

Ailbhe: And then she stuck her face on the magazine! I was like: Charlotte that is not the solution.

Roz: You do not tackle erectile problems by sticking your face on dirty magazines. That is not how it works.

HBO

View Entire List ›